The Intensive English Language Program is a program in which international students take classes and receive tutoring in English for a semester before they take the TOEFL. Receiving passing scores on the TOEFL is what guarantees admission and study the university, so it is a very high-stakes semester, but it is still fun. I tutored for three semesters with students from China, South Korea, Saudi Arabia, and the Ivory Coast. Each time, our conversations started out with surface questions, but they progressed into deeper questions such as thoughts on age, thoughts on the meaning of cleanliness, etc. Through these conversations, I became more and more aware of how little that I really knew, and I learned about the importance of suspending judgement. I also learned about my culture, and how my culture impacts how I view others, and how to combat those negative aspects. Also, I was introduced to a lot of people through becoming friends with my language partners, so I was able to have conversations with other people who were not in the IELI programs.
I started as a beginner in the global citizenship competency, but I gradually stepped out of my comfort zone to learn more about culture, language, self-awareness, and how I can continue to learn and ask deeper questions without reserve while at the same time being appropriate and respectful. Being in a structured environment in which it was understood that we both had goals to learn about each other’s cultures and languages made it easier. Our relationship was not about subordination or having power roles, because we saw each other as friends. Once during a tutoring session, my friend from South Korea and I both brought in makeup so that we could talk about makeup and makeup trends from South Korea and America.
As with any experience, I have experienced some awkward moments and times when I know that I had said something ridiculous. While tutoring my friend from China, I had asked her if she had any siblings, and she responded with a bleak look on her face that she did not have any siblings because she was from China, where there is a one child policy. She was kind and understanding, and I immediately remembered that fact. I felt so embarrassed. I apologized for the question, and I used this experience to remember the importance of knowledge and context in conversations. I also learned the importance of sustaining any and all judgement in conversations about cultural customs, because the judgement and bias from one’s one cultural customs have reflex-like onset. For example, when talking about dating and marriage customs within our respective cultures, my friend from Saudi Arabia and I express different experiences and opinions, so it was important for me to keep an open mind in order to learn. With an open mind, experiences are much more rich, and it becomes easier to ask questions and provide answers.
There can be challenges and awkwardness in cross-cultural communication which tend to deter people from communicating in diverse contexts. However, the experiences and the benefit of learning about others and experiencing the value of culture in our society leads to rich experiences and the reduction of prejudices in our society. Tutoring and becoming friends with people through IELI has opened up opportunities for me to interact with many other people from different culture backgrounds. I experienced the importance of interacting with others and asking questions that are deeper in order to learn more about the similarities and differences of the human experience. I know now that global citizenship and cultural competence is not for me, but it is an essential part of being a compassionate human who can understand and serve others through increased knowledge of different human experiences.